Thursday, December 17, 2009

Appliance Lurve

I admit that I am enamored with certain of my appliances. My Dyson and I are still going strong after two years, the steam carpet cleaner has saved my greyhound from homelessness many times, and I still get a thrill when I cook in my spankin' new stainless steel kitchen, especially when I get to use my Kitchen Aid mixer that was my favoritest Christmas present last year. It is stainless as well, because my beloved cares enough to indulge my matchy-matchy OCD.

I also admit that when I go to a store that carries major appliances, my internal radar takes me directly to the high-efficiency washers and dryers. I approach them with something akin to reverence, lightly passing my fingertips across their gleaming metallic finishes, marveling at the buttons and whistles, opening the doors and ooohing and ahhing and whispering sweet nothings and promising one day we will be together, oh yes, we will. I have actually hugged them goodbye, much to the chagrin of my shopping companions.

When we moved last year, I lobbied for a new washer and dryer. The set I owned was staying at my rental house, and husband's set, although lovely, wasn't Shiny and Steam Powered and didn't sit on a pedestal. I was vetoed.

After moving in and realizing the reason the dryer takes FOREVER to dry clothes is because we have 1.3 miles of dryer vent, I lobbied again, and I was still vetoed. "A new dryer won't solve the problem," he says. Sure, he's right and all but what fun is that?

Today I received a call from my current tenant that the dryer isn't heating up. Of course, because the new tenants will be moving in at the end of the month. The washer and dryer are probably 20 years old. They are Kenmore, made back when Sears made applicances you could count on for decades. We have had (knock wood) one repair on the washer probably 10 years ago, and replaced the heating coil on the dryer about 5 years ago. Otherwise, they run like champs. Damn it.

As my tenant was telling me about the dryer, my mind immediately began scheming to move the husband's washer and dryer to the rental house and then we could get this new set. In my mind, I could already see the set ensconced in my laundry room, washing and drying our clothes with maximum energy efficiency, while choirs of angels sang and a soft beatific glow emanated from our fluffly towels.

Wake up and smell the fabric softener - it ain't gonna happen. A - we don't have that kind of money laying around and B - there is a distinct possibility that if we empty the lint trap and replace the heat coil on the dryer, we're back in business. Damn it.

I also seem to remember that my incoming tenants have their own set, so I won't have to fix it right now anyway. Damn it.

Until then, I will have to settle for ocassional visits at my local retailer. So next time you're at Sears and you see me embracing a dryer, just do like my family does and act like you don't know me. It won't hurt my feelings.


Jeannette E. Spaghetti said...

Tell him if you can't get the new washer and dryer, you at least want to buy the drawers to go under them.

Annie said...

Our dryer broke last weekend. Because I've taken a pay cut each year to keep my job and now my insurance coverage pays way less for my prescriptions, my fiancee is a student and we're paying for a wedding, we have no money for a nice fancy new dryer. Oh, how I long for you, fancy, beautiful, completely efficient dryer! One day, one day... ;)

Anglinco said...

I won't pretend to ignore you, because like you my heart skips a beat when I see those washer and dryers. I too am having a secret love affair in the middle of the appliance section at Best Buy.

MaLeah said...

Oh my gosh Kim, this is the funniest post you've ever written! Here's to hoping that maybe Santa has a surprise waiting for you under the Christmas tree! I can pass along a not so subtle hint if you'd like.

A Dyson huh, I'm truly jealous. I thought we were cool with our new Dirt Devil. When we brought home our shiny, new red baby home from Target, Matthew and I fought over who got to use it first. I finally relented to letting him be the one to turn it on and run it one swipe across the living room rug if he would agree to let me vacuum the rest of the house. Who knew watching dirt whirl around in a see-thru plastic canister could be so exciting?

Jaelithe said...

Um, I would not act like I didn't know you. I would join you in hugging the dryer.

My husband and I bought the best set we could afford when we got married-- which, ahem, was not very good. We still have them and they work fine but I keep telling myself it would be eco-friendlier to get a high efficiency set . . . and we all want to be responsible about the planet, right? Right?

Kelli said...

I love that washer and dryer set. Do you ever wonder what happened to bring you to a point where a washer and dryer got you all giddy and excited?