Thursday, April 24, 2008

The Mundane

Remember learing about onomatopoeia in English class? I think mundane is an example. It's just a blah sounding word, isn't it? Munn-dayne. Bo-ring.

I really wish that I had been blogging longer, and could go back through my posts and relive moments in my life. Even the mundane.

I've read some bloggers who have asked their readers to tell them if they are getting boring, or are blogging about certain aspects of their lives too much. To them I say, blog it. Don't count on your memory. Man, I wish I'd had this media when my kids were younger. I've been racking my brain trying to remember funny little moments in their lives. Hell, I wish I'd been better at writing in their baby books. I thought, "oh, I'll remember this." And now I don't.

Photographs do help. I put together photo boards for the funeral, and I would find pictures and say "oh yeah, I remember why she was doing that." One of Jessica's friends told me that she was so glad Jessica took pictures all the time, because now they can look at them and remember what they were doing, even if it seemed ordinary at the time.

They died five months ago yesterday. I remember what we were doing last year at this time. Jessica had gone to Senior Prom and was gearing up for graduation, and we were dealing with stress of finding student aid. Kelli was doing cheerleader tryouts, and looking forward to summertime. Maddy was looking forward to her first communion and getting out of school.

There's so much more, I'm sure, but what was it? The combination of age, daily brain overload, and grief is clouding my memories. I try to grab ahold of them when I can, but it's like catching smoke sometimes.

1 comment:

Frogdancer said...

How true. We're so busy living that we forget to record things. I was talking to someone yesterday and saying "One of the kids lost a tooth the same way your kid did..." Did I know which one? No. Put a gun to my head and I still wouldn't be able to give you the correct answer. Life's like that. (Or maybe I just had too many kids!!)

It sounds like you have lots of Jess's photos. If that's the case, then you're lucky. Maybe you could do a diary or blog where you detail specific memories of days, events, little things that you remember so that they don't keep fading. With some of them, at least, you'll even have photos to go with them. I don't know.... I think maybe that's what I'd do.